I Need Your Help!


As you may or may not know I am working on a new book called Behind the silence. This book is a true story about being bullied at school. I am doing a promotional video for the book. I thought I would do a question and answer as I have found a lot of people have many questions about being bullied when I have told people previously. Some of the questions I have been asked many times before are things like;

Did you tell anyone you were being bullied?

Did you not move them off you? etc

If there are any questions you can think of to ask about bullying in general or my bullying specifically please comment below. You questions will be much appreciated. 

This is an extract from the book to get some question ideas!

  At first I had ignored them, even when Rachel said they were talking about me. Even when they started flicking paint in my direction, dotting the back of my crumpled white school shirt with red. Even when they started shouting my name and making rude comments about my body, my breasts. Don’t they realise how much I hate myself? How much I want to cut them off?

  Sitting on a wonky stool, my arms feel heavy leaning on the table with my head buried in them. My cheeks are burning red with shame, tears are pouring down from my eyes. I can hear the pack of boy’s behind me laughing hysterically, laughing at me.

“It’s o.k. Lucy” Becky says in my ear. I don’t move, too scared to lift my head and show that they have got to me. “I don’t understand it, as Sophie’s are much bigger than yours”. Becky has her arm around my shoulders protectively. I wish I could just disappear through the floor and never come back.

  Lifting my head very slightly I can see the teacher pretending nothing is going on. By now the whole class is involved but he is looking intently at a piece of paper as if willing it to swallow him up. I know the feeling. It doesn’t cross my mind that he should be doing anything, probably because this has happened so many times before. I have given up hoping.

  Something hits my back, a screwed up piece of paper. I don’t react. Mum always says you should just ignore them, that they will give up if you don’t respond. I have a sickening feeling that Mum couldn’t be anymore wrong.

“Why are you always so nasty to her? Leave her alone” Sophie wades in, I can feel her standing behind me looking crossly at the pack. It is not very often that anyone sticks up for me so I am grateful for the change.

  Peeping out at the pack from the crook of my elbow I can see Mr X and Mr Y making obscene gestures with their hands and the other wolves all laughing and pointing. Still the teacher says and does nothing. At least Mr X hasn’t tried to touch me yet, that is always the worst. Wait. I can feel that familiar chill of dread when Mr X is near, the certainty that whatever is about to happen is going to be excruciatingly embarrassing.

 

  Finally the bell for the end of class rings. The pack forget what they are doing, running out the door as fast as their little legs will carry them. Tripping over themselves in the hurry to get to their feeding time in the hall. The girls quickly follow, one or two of them giving a pat on the back, a hug.

  I scrape my stool back, standing slowly I walk towards the toilet to compose myself and dull the anger before I go out into the world again. I have survived another morning in my living hell.

 

Poem’s Revisited (Dear Mr X)


http://youtu.be/rUHnT2U79Ms

If only you could see me now

You thought I would give up

Curl up in a ball and let you win

But you couldn’t have been more wrong

 

You thought you could make me suffer,

So I could never get my life back again

You mistakenly thought you were better than me

Just shows how stupid you really are

 

If only you could see me now,

Now all your hair has gone,

Stuck in your little house with no one to fill it,

Jobbing around with your fancy degree

 

At least you have done all the things you made sure I couldn’t

It’s not got you very far but hey!

At least you have your dingy little flat,

So now you can sit there all alone, like you made me do before

 

If only you could see me now,

With the man who loves me more than you ever did

With a house that is all our own

And happiness you wouldn’t even understand

 

I’ve done all the things you said I couldn’t

I’m still standing here tall today

Without your heavy presence hanging over me,

Shrouding me in your suffocating fog

 

But don’t worry I will show you pity,

While you’re eating the dirt, like you should,

More than you ever bothered to show me,

If only you could see me now!

Lucy’s Diary (19/08/14)


These photo’s were actually taken while we were waiting for the Caribbean carnival on Sunday.

Every year during the school summer holidays they put a beach in Nottingham old market square.

It is a two hour drive to the nearest beach from Nottingham so this city beach is very popular.

As you can see they have all the usual sweet stalls and things that you would get at a British beach resort.

 

 

Poem’s Revisited (I Can Promise You That)


http://youtu.be/jWCjy-5bFZQ

 

I know you won’t ever forget me

Because I will make you remember.

You will notice I still exist

Oh,

I can promise you that.

 

The lesson today is to live with your past

You will have to learn how to.

Memories will never be forgotten

Let’s face it; I know that better than most

 

I new you better than you did

But you have never known me

That makes me laugh so hard

Because you will get such a shock

 

I am not angry anymore, it’s just pity

I lived with your mistakes

Now I will make you live with them too

Oh,

I can promise you that.

 

By Lucy Williams

This poem will be in my new book Behind the silence.

Lucy’s Diary (17/08/14)


IT’S NOTTINGHAM CARNIVAL TIME!!!

The very pregnant lady is my old belly dancing teacher. Seeing them all there giving it their all makes me want to go back!

 

Quite a few will happily pose if they see you brandishing your camera.

There is always someone who likes to make it political albeit local politics.

Even three old ladies joined in the fun!